27 February 2012

Fingers crossed!

11 weeks

Thank you so much for all your lovely comments. We are so, so excited but also very nervous. This is my 5th pregnancy after all, and out of my previous four pregnancies only one ended in a healthy little baby. But, so far so good.. I am 11 weeks already!

So far this pregnancy has been a absolute roller-coaster of emotions. We ended up falling pregnant naturally just days before we were due to start IVF. I am so glad because I was really worried about going down the IVF path, although after a year of trying to fall pregnant since Grace died, I was prepared to do anything!

Because of my history, the fertility centre offered me a 'early pregnancy monitoring program' where they check your hormone levels every week until 8 weeks. At 6 weeks I started bleeding very badly and called Tom in tears, he rushed home and we called the hospital who told me that I could not come in until 7am the next morning. We basically spent the night in tears.. I had lost so much blood that I just had no hope of things being okay. Tom had said that just that very morning he had been hanging the washing out before work and thought to himself 'we just need this one thing to go well' and then that very day I called and said I thought it was all over.. we were devastated beyond belief.

The next morning we went to the hospital and had an ultrasound and were told that everything looked fine! We could not believe it! It was too early to see a heartbeat but apparently everything looked great and the bleeding was coming from a blood clot in my uterus. That sounded pretty scary to us but the nurses kept saying "oh, it's only a blood clot, thats great news" so we assumed that it was all okay. The doctors put me on progesterone supplements and injections of HCG to try and 'support' the pregnancy.

At 7 weeks I went back into hospital with bad pains, not cramps, but a really strange uterus pain. We were really worried but again an ultrasound showed that everything looked fine and this week there was a little heartbeat! I also started to feel really tired and really nauseous which was a good sign that everything was going well.

I spent the next few weeks in bed with severe tiredness and nausea, I was the same when I was pregnant with Sophie and Grace.. seriously feels like I have been hit by a truck! But I was still bleeding and feeling funny pains so I was very worried.
At 9 weeks I had my first appointment with my obstetrician only to find out that I had a UTI (Urinary Tract Infection) that had been left untreated for 3 weeks and was put on antibiotics. I was also told that it can be quite risky to get a UTI in early pregnancy.. which was just what I needed.. something else to worry about! Tom and I kept saying "why can't we just have a normal pregnancy like everyone else?"

So here I am.. 11 weeks pregnant. And if everything is fine at the ultrasound I have this Thursday, then we will need to get through the biggest hurdle of all.. on Friday morning I go into hospital to have a cervical stitch. It's a very risky procedure and comes with a 10-15% chance that we will loose the baby. I am beside myself with fear. But I am trying my hardest to be positive.. we have an 85-90% chance of everything going well and I have to keep reminding myself of that. And if all does goes well, I will then be on full bed rest for the remainder of the pregnancy.

It's been a pretty stressful few weeks and I am just so nervous and so scared. I really wish I had a time machine and I could just fast forward to a time in the future when all is well and I have a healthy little full-term baby in my arms. Please keep your fingers crossed for me on Thursday and Friday!

Tom took this photo of me at the farm on the weekend. I popped out at about 8 weeks this time around.. I guess everything is pretty stretchy by now!

25 comments:

Susan said...

good luck for Friday! I really hope it all goes smoothly for you. I hope you've got lots of books and movies planned for the bed rest. Maybe some hand sewing or embroidery to pass the time? I hate bed rest but it will be worth it!

Jess @ Caffeine and Tutus said...

Thinking of you and sending positive thoughts your way! Also- you look stunning in this photo xx

Sarah said...

All the very best. I will also be thinking of you on Friday. Best wishes.

Lexi:: PottyMouthMama said...

Will be thinking of you Thursday and Friday.

PS - You are truly one of the most photogenic people I have ever seen. BEAUTIFUL. x

Kitty said...

Such a bumpy ride you've had. All the best for friday I'm sending you lot's of positive vibes. 85-90% is pretty good odds when you look at it statistically, fingers & toes are crossed.
You're looking fantastic! I'm so impressed with that bump. x

joanna said...

Fingers crossed for Thursday and Friday - sending lots of positive energy your way!! xxxx

Coal Valley View said...

Hi there, I'm new to your lovely blog, just found you via Sarah. Congratulations on your baby news!!! I've got my fingers crossed for you too. Mel xx

sara said...

it's so strange to feel so happy for someone i don't know but i am just so delighted for you and have everything crossed for friday. i just love how honest you are about pregnancy and fertility, it is really not the dream ride we all grow up thinking it will be and it is so important to hear what really happens. but you do it all with such grace, the true sense of your darling girl's name. amazing to see that bump already, you look radiant.

Ekd80 said...

All the best for Friday. I will keep my fingers and toes crossed for you. Your bump looks beautiful!

Michele said...

sending warm thoughts (and love the pic!)

I had a cervical stitch placed with B&M when I was 11w. If you go to my May 2009 archives, the details are in there. Please dont hesitate to email me if you have any questions or just want a cheering squad! :)

Hugs!

Anonymous said...

Good luck for Friday. I have a friend wh had a cervical stitch and now has a gorgeous one year old daughter.

Maddie said...

Wow - you've been a lot so far. Here's to a much more boring rest of your pregnancy.

There's a little girl in my mother's group who's Mum had a sitch and spent the pregnancy on bed rest. She's a beautiful 17 month old now.

I know how hard pregnancy after loss is and totally understand about wanting the time machine.

We're all here for you.

Alison said...

I will be thinking of you all on Friday Katie. Gorgeous photo.

val said...

praying for you and safe pregnancy!

tea with lucy said...

oh boy, katie. What a roller coaster ride you've been on.

hope everything goes smoothly from here on in. you certainly deserve it.


xoxo

little miss olive said...

good luck for friday -- and i just wanted to tell you that someone i know had the cervical stitch (as they lost a previous pregnancy) and everything worked out fine. they now have a beautiful baby girl. i hope hearing this helps. *big hugs*

Bec said...

Wishing you all the best. It is so wonderful to hear your great news, after all you have been through.

Victoria said...

Not only will I be crossing my fingers but all the other body parts that I can cross too.
Wishing you & your family all the best, Good Luck. xx

jodi said...

Sending you an abundance of positive affirmations Katie.

Whenever I have students who have had challenging experiences with past pregnancies I always encourage them to create a sankalpa (positive affirmation) and repeat it to themselves daily.

Usually something like this:

"I will carry my baby to full term and birth calmly and confidently a healthy baby."

Yogis believe that a sankalpa that is repeated daily and never shared will always be realised. In moments of fear and doubt it can help.

You are radiating pure pregnancy beauty. Thinking of you so much on Thursday/Friday x

one yellow jumpsuit. said...

You look gorgeous. I will thinking and praying for you and your family on Thursday and Friday. xx

Jacinta @ modelmumma said...

Such great news Katie! All the best for this pregnancy, will be praying that all goes well! xo

Anonymous said...

Fingers are very much crossed for you. Thursday and Friday. And onwards.

Anonymous said...

Sending you my thoughts throughout the day today

Amanda said...

SOOOO happy for you Katie and sending lots of positive vibes your way for your and your sweet bub xx

Steph said...

What is a cervical stitch and why did the dr say u needed it? I have had 5 miscarriages but I also have 3 healthy boys. Our last was born 7 years after his older brother and so now we are trying to give that boy a sibling. He will be three in May so if we don't do something soon, it will be another big gap! Anyway, I was just curious about the stitch. Congratulations on this pregnancy and I hope it continues to go well.

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